|Air Date||February 26, 1998|
|← The Strong Box · The Burning →|
Jerry buys his dad a $200 Wizard organizer for a birthday present. George receives a message from Susan's parents, the Rosses. Jerry and George debate about the race of Elaine's new boyfriend and that intrigues her – is he black? George returns the call from the Rosses; the Foundation is having an event this weekend, but George doesn't want to attend, so he comes up with a story that he has to close on his house in the Hamptons. Kramer announces his retirement, a Hollywood big shot has optioned his coffee table book about coffee tables. Elaine finds evidence that leads her to believe her boyfriend is black. Susan's parents see George on the street in the city, during the time he is supposed to be in the Hamptons.
At Del Boca Vista Phase III, Jerry is woken up early in the morning at his parents' house and gives his father the Wizard which Jerry claims he got from a deal at only $50. Morty is only impressed by it being a "tip calculator" although Jerry claims it does other things. Later, he discovers that Kramer has moved down there, to join the other retirees.
Elaine laughs when Susan's parents ask her about George's house in the Hamptons, revealing the lies.
Jerry is seen dining with his parents in Del Boca Vista's restaurant as Helen comments that Jerry's gift serves as a distraction for Morty due to the upcoming election for president of the condo association. Jerry comments that Mort can't run for president of the condo association because he was impeached from The Pines of Mar Gables Phase II. Morty claims that he was never impeached, he resigned. Helen quotes that the condo newsletter The Boca Breeze would've buried Morty. After being told from a local resident that Kramer scored a date with the young aquacise instructor, Morty decides that Kramer should be elected condo board president of Del Boca Vista Phase III, so Morty will run things from behind the scenes, like a "puppet regime".
Elaine schemes to try to determine her boyfriend's race.
As George finds out the Rosses knew that he lied, and they allowed him to continue lying, he keeps building on his lie and picks up the Rosses to take them to the Hamptons, to "see who'll blink first".
Kramer begins his campaign and the condo newsletter, The Boca Breeze has good things to say about him. When Elaine's boyfriend says they are an interracial couple, she is convinced he is black. Kramer receives some bad press from The Boca Breeze upon having gone barefoot to a club when he couldn't find his shoes. Morty considers it a huge scandal and decides that it's damage control time. Kramer suggests buying each member of the board one of those Wizard "tip calculators". Jerry knows he can't get the deal he told his father he'd received, but Kramer says not to worry because Bob Sacamano's father lives down there and can help them out.
Elaine discovers her boyfriend is not black, and that he referred to them as an interracial couple because he thought she was Hispanic, leaving both to contemplate how they're just two white people.
Sacamano's father comes through with knock-off "tip calculators" called "the Willard", which can't calculate tips properly and in some cases lack a full complement of numerals, costing Morty and Kramer the election and causing everyone to vote for the candidate in the wheelchair. Kramer decides to move back to New York upon coming out of retirement. When Morty makes a comment about the Wizard to Jerry, he tells Morty that it has other features.
During the credits, George and the Rosses reach the Hamptons, where he blinks first and the truth is revealed. The Rosses confirm that they dislike George, and blame him for Susan's death.
Notes About Nothing
- In the Seinfelds' condo board newspaper, Boca Breeze, the name Larry David is found in smaller headlines: "Larry David Gets Hole In One!, "Larry David Hurts Elbow", and "Larry David Never To Play Golf Again"
- George's line "You wanna' get nuts? Come on! Let's get nuts!" is from the 1989 movie Batman, as spoken by Michael Keaton's character Bruce Wayne.