"The Truth" is the 2nd episode of Season Three, and the 19th episode overall. It originally aired on September 25, 1991.
The episode was written by Elaine Pope, and directed by David Steinberg.
Plot
George Costanza tells his girlfriend Patrice, who was a former IRS agent, that they are breaking up. Patrice demands to know why; at first George attempts to lie by saying that he has a fear of intimacy, but then he is persuaded to tell the truth, which is that she is pretentious, she calls everyone by his/her full name (as George's doorman Sammy "Samuel" but pronouncing it as "Sam-u-el"), and that he didn’t get about the "Papier-Maché hats which she manufactured and sold".
Meanwhile, Jerry prepares for an audit because of a fraudulent volcano relief fund for Krakatoa. Jerry states that Kramer asked him to donate during his first date with Elaine. Jerry than says that if it wasn't for George dating a former IRS agent, he would have killed Kramer. George then buzzes up; he tells Jerry that his whole life has been a waste and all he has ever needed to do is tell the truth and that he had just ended his relationship with Patrice. George then realizes that she had taken Jerry's papers and attempts to call her at work to retrieve them; he gets her secretary who says she had never returned from lunch; he then calls her at home where Patrice answers then promptly hangs up.
In a subplot, Kramer dates Tina, Elaine's roommate. She requests that Kramer stop the tribal music and the make-out sessions on the couch and when he makes spaghetti to not strain the sauce because she hates scrubbing hardened red sauce out of the strainer holes. Kramer finds a windshield on the side of the road and decides to make it into a coffee table as a gift for Tina. Jerry states that it would be invisible.
George discovers that Patrice had checked herself into a depression clinic. He and Jerry decide to visit her to ask if she will still help him with the audit. Kramer enters the apartment and shortly after so does Elaine. Elaine and Kramer exchange awkward hellos and Kramer reveals that he had seen Elaine naked by accidentally going into her room. Kramer offers to make up for it by letting Elaine see him naked and they both decline.
Later at the depression clinic, Jerry and George talk to Patrice about the audit papers and Patrice says she was so mad after her lunch with George that she threw the papers away and she will need copies; Jerry then states that he didn't have any copies.
Jerry tries to track down all of the receipts from the past few years. Elaine walks into hers and Tina's apartment to see a huge disaster in the kitchen and tribal music playing; Kramer comes dancing out of a bedroom wearing only a pink towel. Elaine tells Kramer to put something on. Tina sticks her head out from the bedroom and asks Kramer if he is coming back to bed; in response, Kramer says they should go to the couch. He turns off the lights and Tina and he proceed to the couch only to crash into the invisible coffee table.
Back at Jerry's apartment Jerry says he may have tracked down another receipt for a computer that he had purchased in 1987. He asks Elaine and Kramer if they would like to go with him but they say that they have to go visit Tina in the hospital because she injured herself on the coffee table.
Quotes
Jerry: What was I supposed to do? You knew I was on my first date with Elaine. You come barging in here asking me to contribute money for a volcano relief fund for Krakatoa!
Kramer: It was supposed to erupt.
Jerry: I find the whole thing very embarrassing.
George: I've driven women to lesbianism before but never to a mental institution.