"That's it. This is it. I'm done. Through. It's over. I'm gone. Finished. Over. I will never work for you again! Look at you, haha! You think that you're an important man? Is that what you think? You are a laughing stock. You are a joke. These people are laughing at you. You're nothing! You have no brains, no ability, nothing! I quit." - George's resignation from the real estate business
"What should I tell him [Newman], how much there is for him to live for? Why should I lie to him?" - Kramer
"Fluff and fold - the only way to live! I drop it off, I pick it up, it's a delight!" - Jerry on his use of the launderette
"It's perfectly safe, I researched it. He'll get a little woozy (pause) He might keel over." - George, on planning to slip his ex boss a 'Mickey'
"Would you close your eyes a second? I wanna tell you a secret about my bra!" - Elaine
Vic: "Hey, you see that sign right there?" (Points to a sign that reads 'Not Responsible for Valuables')
Jerry: "Oh, I see. So, you put up a sign so you can do whatever you want? You're not a part of society."
Vic: "Yeah, that's right, 'cause this place is my country and I'm the president, and that's my constitution. I'm not responsible."
Jerry: "So, anybody leaves anything here, you can just take it. You have a license to steal. You are like the James Bond of laundry."